Event: The Sprite Can

It was quietly sitting there in the middle of the sidewalk. A tall, empty can of Sprite, the tab popped open. I had just left my apartment for a brief walk in the sun when the shiny aluminum caught my eye. Surely the can hadn’t been sitting there for long. It looked brand new. Someone had probably ripped it from a six pack, chugged the contents, and thoughtlessly left the container behind. I was almost tempted to relocate the can to a garbage bin, but the thought of whose hands – and lips – had touched the metal stopped me. This was downtown Salt Lake City and for all I knew, the soda had belonged to some druggie, homeless person, or another less-than-clean being.
A brilliant thought entered my brain. Of course! I would just play “kick the can” until I got the can close enough to a garbage bin, and hopefully the garbage man (who would already be somewhat dirty) would take it with the rest of the trash.
Brilliant.
I geared up for the kick, my leg back and swinging it forward with all my might. The garbage bin, after all, was still a ways up the street. Time slowed and I kept my eyes glued to the little can, excited to see the little thing fly.
As soon as my foot came in contact with the Sprite can, I became suddenly and chillingly aware that the empty can was a lot heavier than an empty can should be. A split second after that realization, the can exploded and spiraled away from me. My kick propelled the can forward. I watched in disbelief as sprite sloshed everywhere. The sweet liquid sprayed nearby cars, the windows of the closest buildings, even a passing cat.
A few seconds later the can settled just a few yards in front of me. I stood there in shock for another thirty seconds. Eventually my silent shock faded into merely horrified mortification and I quickly surveyed the scene. Luckily I found myself alone and relieved that no one had seen my little stunt.
I continued walking with my head bowed as if nothing had happened, carefully stepping around the Sprite stains and the now crushed can.
I was about 96.7% sure that the ordeal was my own embarrassing secret. However, as I was on my way home just ten minutes later, the Sprite can was gone.
Apparently someone had seen.